No Good

 

Following is a list of things I am no good at:

1. Reverse psychology.
2. Pronouncing "anesthesia."
3. Multiplying numbers in my head.
4. Reversing in my boat.
5. Keeping earthworms in my refrigerator.
6. Remembering birthdays.
7. Opening the plastic bags provided in the produce section.
8. Avoiding the potato chip aisle.
9. Knitting.
10. Finding Waldo.
11. Political reasoning.
12. Gambling.
13. Feng Shui.

—Mitchell Hegman