We Heard a Big Bird

My brother-in-law, Terry, and I drove up to see how my cabin was holding up as the last of the melting snow overfills the creek in the nearby meadow.  While standing alongside the cabin and enjoying a swath of sunlight amid the tree-shadows, a somewhat sharp, repetitive sound reached us from somewhere up-creek.

“That’s a new one,” I remarked.  “That’s a big bird.”

The call stopped, picked up again, stopped, picked up.

“That’s a big bird looking for a mate,” Terry said with authority.

“I think you’re right,” I responded.  “But what is it?  What does a great blue heron sound like?  Maybe that’s what it is.”

Neither Terry nor I are birders.  I cannot identify birds by their calls.  I don’t know a twee-chur-twee-twee from a sputter-sputter-chick-chick.

As we listened, our big bird called one last time and then suddenly thumped into a new form of sound.

Oh, jeez.

Not a bird.  Instead, the sound we heard was a backhoe upstream cranking a few times before starting.  We had noticed on the machine on drive in.

“Did we both just do that?” Terry asked me.  “Did we both think that was a bird?”

“Yup.  We are a couple morons.”

“But we don’t need to tell anybody about it.”

“Nope.  No need for that.”

The Final Snowbank Alongside the Cabin (Near the Big Bird)

—Mitchell Hegman

Formatting Errors

I regularly skirmish with electronic devices and the associated software. For the last four days, I have been in a battle like no other.

I purchased a small twenty-four-dollar label printer – a device capable of connecting with either a computer or smartphone. Thinking I would prefer to work from my computer, I downloaded the proper driver and thought I might print a practice label.

I'll be brief here: nope.

An error popup appeared when I clicked on the label maker icon. After a chat with tech support here in the USA, a three-day string of emails with China, and multiple downloads, my computer continued providing the same error.

Near the end of day three, I downloaded an app to my smartphone and took a swing at connecting with that. Surprisingly, the printer and phone are on speaking terms, but print formatting is evading me thus far.

I have posted a photograph of my best work thus far. You may be able to make out my name in the upper right.  I must admit, this is the most frustrating twenty-four-dollar expenditure I have ever made.

My Best Label to Date

—Mitchell Hegman

My List of Worries About Artificial Intelligence

A lot of knowledgeable people are sounding alarms on the potential dangers posed by Artificial Intelligence (AI).  Not least among these is the fear AI will deem humans “the enemy” and wipe us out.  Following is my own list of worries about AI:

• I worry that AI will conjure up a valid reason for a second scientific study to determine if flies conduct a loop or side-roll to land on the ceiling.
• AI could produce a bunch of robots to scour the Earth and pick up all the good rocks before I get there.
• A nefarious AI may deem my entire cluster of computer and smartphone passwords as invalid.
• What if, using the influence of all media, AI made disco music popular again?
• Spiders.  AI has the capability to turn every icon I interact with into crawling spider icons.
• Sociologists fear AI could create a new religion and draw in masses of adherents.  Imagine a popular faith invented by machines.    

—Mitchell Hegman 

A Rough Beginning

While shuffling through paperwork in my den, I found a set of crude sketches in a notebook.  The drawings were produced a couple years ago by a roofer and I while debating ideas for roofing transitions and flashing ideas for attaching the sunroom to my house.  The drawings are both spare and ugly and not likely to make a lick of sense to anyone else looking at them.

For me, the sketches make perfect sense and I looked upon them fondly.

I have posted a photograph of the rudimentary drawing along with a photograph of the now finished sunroom.

As you can see, we strayed a bit from our first concept.  A good thing, that.

The Sketch

The Sunroom

—Mitchell Hegman

Free Verse

Danielle Steel has penned 204 books.  Only one of her works is a book of free verse poetry.  Curious about her poetry, I hunted down and read a few Danielle Steel poems.  I must admit, I enjoyed a few of her lines and liked a couple poems as a whole.  I found Steel’s poems reaching far deeper in imagination and imagery than those of Rod Mckuen, a man credited with more than 200 books of poetry and one of the best-selling American poets of all time.

—Mitchell Hegman

Taking Measure

In May of 2014, I began writing the first draft of a book that details the functions and uses of digital multimeters (DMMs). Weirdly enough, I really enjoy using and talking about DMMs. In addition to writing the book, titled 'Taking Measure', I developed in-person training and various lab sessions to demonstrate DMM measurement procedures and possible pitfalls.

Much of the work in the book, including layout, illustrations, and editing, is thanks to the efforts of John (Jug) Jones and High Mark Media. Yesterday, we launched several social media platforms and 'went live' with sales of 'Taking Measure'. Here we are: two kids from East Helena with a book.

Dragging 'Taking Measure' to the finish line proved much more difficult than I ever imagined. In addition to the book, John and I have produced dozens of videos to accompany the written word.

Take a glance at (and purchase a copy of) 'Taking Measure' at www.takingmeasure.net. Also, find and follow 'Taking Measure' on Facebook.

Taking Measure

—Mitchell Hegman

One Year

As of today, Desiree has been here in Montana for a year.

In her first year, Desiree has harvested huckleberries, snowshoed in four feet of snow, unearthed dinosaur bones, tubed behind my pontoon boat, found sapphires, and spotted her first grizzly bear on the Rocky Mountain Front.

And, oh yeah, there was that day last June when we got married.

Good stuff.

—Mitchell Hegman