Okay. Grab a cup of coffee. Those of you who like a little kick-start are
welcome to spike your cup. We need to
have a frank discussion about sex and balloons this morning. The specific subject for today is “looners.”
Looners are people who
have a balloon fetish.
I watched a television program
about looners the other night. I would
like to say I accidentally landed on the show, but it’s more complicated
than that. Anyhow, the program ranged
from fascinating to, well, a little creepy at points.
Looners are attracted to
balloons for any variety of reasons. The
color of some balloons might trigger affection for some people. For others, the texture, scent, size, shape, the
way balloons move about, or any combination of all might tip the scales.
And there is more.
Two distinct types of
looners emerge once you fill a room with balloons.
“Poppers” are looners who
particularly enjoy popping balloons.
Some of these folks equate the popping of a balloon with—I’m sure you
guessed—an orgasm. Big bangs are better.
“Non-poppers” don’t like
popping balloons at all. Most
non-poppers will do most anything to avoid popping a balloon. Many in this group find the popping of a
balloon quite destressing.
In both cases, this is a “hands
on” fetish.
Balloons are the thing.
One of the men featured in
the show, a non-popper, said he felt “very close” to his balloons. His affection for them was something akin to
what he feels for people. He stuffed his
shirt with balloons. He filled his bed
with them. He hugged his balloons.
As a whole, I found
looners a fascinating lot. Not really my
thing, but as fetishes go, I would rate this fetish as mild. Honestly, I am more disturbed by people who
take-up two spaces when they park their car or truck—and I am one of those!
--Mitchell
Hegman
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