Only an idiot would wear one of his better shirts while splitting firewood.
I suspect you know where I’m going
with this.
We’ve already established I don’t
clean behind my ears, can’t spell anything longer than “dog,” and am a certified
idiot.
So, one of the chunks of wood I
chopped—while wearing one of my better shirts—smeared a swath of sticky pitch
on it when I attempted to stack it. Surprisingly, an internet query immediately
landed me on an agent for the removal of tree sap: rubbing alcohol.
I’m here to announce—rubbing alcohol
works flawlessly (entire sentence spellchecked).
Thank you, great interweb!
Cordwood Stack
—Mitchell Hegman
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