Photography And Half-Thoughts By Mitchell Hegman

...because some of it is pretty and some of it is not.

Friday, June 26, 2026

More Phone Apps I would Like

Desiree and I recently upgraded to new smartphones. They came preloaded with a swath of apps and games we will never use. Vita Mahjong is one example. But that got me thinking about some apps I would enjoy having on my phone. Following is a list of those:

  • A music app that converts songs you don't like into your choice of Stairway to Heaven or Knockin' on Heaven's Door.
  • An app that locates the nearest bathroom.
  • An app that emits a sound that will make ravens shut the hell up.
  • A metal-cutting laser app.
  • An app that remembers people's names for me.
  • An app that makes hurt go away.
  • An app that automatically slays spambots.
  • An app that universally changes "creek" to "crick," the proper pronunciation for those of us who grew up in East Helena, Montana.
  • An app that turns political arguments into recipes.

Mitchell Hegman

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