I
make salads. Desiree, owing to her vastly superior capabilities, covers all the
other prep and cooking on either side of that.
I
like to chop up all kinds of stuff to add to my salads. Nuts, sweet onion,
olives, cabbage, and broccoli are commonly added to a base of kale, lettuce,
spinach, and arugula.
Welp,
yesterday I had a broccoli incident. Apparently, I got a little too frisky
while chopping. As my buddy Kenny used to put it: “I was going at it like a
one-armed man killing snakes.” Somehow, even while wearing glasses, a speck of
broccoli flicked up into my right eye.
To
be perfectly honest, it only sort of hurt, but if someone had been around, I
would have played it up a bit. In the end, I merely rubbed my eye, and the
broccoli vanished.
I
would like my broccoli incident to serve as a cautionary tale. I’m not
suggesting we need to start wearing safety glasses when chopping broccoli. But
that particular broccoli clearly chose violence. And there may be others.
—Mitchell Hegman
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