Three Little-Known Facts

1. There is no direct translation of the English term “fuckweed” into Islandic.

2. In the wild, moose do not “prance” naturally.  A moose will prance only if someone sneaks up and slugs them full-force in the soft part of the belly.

3. Worldwide, there are only four known cases of people surviving slugging a moose in the belly.  In all cases, the survivors were males between the age of eighteen and twenty.  All had been drinking alcohol.

--Mitchell Hegman