Candy with a Twist (and a Stinger)

As a general rule, I don’t begin sentences with the phrase “as a general rule.”  Today, I make exception.

Here goes.

As a general rule, scorpions are not my first craving when I think of sweets.  I am a more traditional, REESE’S Peanut Butter Cup guy.   I will admit to an occasional yen for black licorice ice cream—something that induces shuddering in more than a few people around me.

Scorpion candies are, as they say in my hometown of East Helena, Montana, “a whole ‘nuther thing.”

Yesterday, while I, that girl, little Miss Mackenna, and her parents were on an outing in the city of Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio, we stopped at a candy store called Mr. Bulky’s Foods.  The place was wall to wall candy.  Most of the candy is sold in bulk form and is measured by the pound.  You stroll amid bins filled with hard candies and chocolates and toffees and anything you might imagine.  All arranged in festive rainbows of color.

Until you reach the bugs.

Bam!

There they are, right in your face.  Crickets.  Mealworms.  Ants.  Scorpions.

I am not opposed to eating bugs (feel free to step in with a comment here, Alan B).  I have, at various points in my life, eaten: common house flies, ants, moths, crickets, coconut worms, and I once got the taste of a boxelder bug when one inadvertently crashed inside my open mouth.

Note: boxelder bugs are wholly unpalatable.

I must admit.  I was tempted to purchase a box of crickets.  They are not bad eating.   And, for a minute, I even debated buying a scorpion sucker just because the opportunity seemed so rare and exciting.

In the end, I settled for capturing some photographs with my smarter-than-me-phone.

-- Mitchell Hegman