Customer Support

Dear Customer Support,

Last year, I replaced three windows with your Xxxxxxx brand vinyl windows.  The windows are lovely.  The screens, on the other hand, are really mismatched.  I am talking Bambi versus King Kong mismatched.   With the first puff of wind from the outside, the screens pop free and land on my floor, leaving my house wide open and exposed to anything hanging about outside, which, since I live in wild Montana, could be anything from a grizzly bear with poor people skills to a mob (pack, swarm, pod, murder, flock, whatever!) of common houseflies.

I contacted our local Xxxxxxx dealer (by the way, we also call people who sell illicit drugs “dealers”) and got new replacement screens.

Guess what?

Pop!  Pop!

The brand new screens similarly flung themselves to the floor at the first hint of wind. 

The screens are super-flimsy and the spring-loaded tabs for holding them in place are wholly inadequate.

Here is my thought: “Let’s fix this.”

I am of a mind that the number one big boss should know about the screen problem.  I assume such a catastrophic flaw would be something the big boss would really want fixed.  I am guessing a lot of other people are having the same issue with screens.  Surely we can devise a retrofit solution.

Does the big boss know about fly-away screens?  Do you ever talk to the big boss?  If I talked nice, could I talk with the big boss?

Please contact me at your earliest convenience.  I would appreciate the opportunity to resolve this problem before something bad climbs into my house through an open window and stomps on one of your screens.

Sincerely,

Customer Mitch

Mitchell Hegman

NOTE: I sent this message off to “Customer Support” yesterday.  I have redacted the manufacturer’s name.  More later…