1. Make friends with the chipmunk constantly flinging itself across
the deck at my cabin.
2. Teach the rest of the world to spell nooodles with an extra “o” just for fun.
3. Invent a scented spray that, when misted across loud and blustering
people, turns them into a potted begonia plants with pink plastic bells
dangling from the stem of each leaf.
4. Find a dime and a couple quarters in the cushions of my sofa (the
same way I did as a kid).
5. Clean under my refrigerator.
6. Travel to Plains, Montana again.
—Mitchell Hegman
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