The Laws of Shopping

• There is no such thing as too much parmesan cheese.
• If you walk down the potato chip aisle, you will be compelled to buy a bag of chips.
• Remembering to purchase the salad dressing will force an error elsewhere on the list.
• Whatever you bought last week is on sale this week.
• Some of the produce bags are purposely sealed shut on both ends.
• The shortest checkout line generally harbors someone with an item requiring a price check.
• The one item you entered the store specifically to buy will be the one item you forget.
• The cart with the squeaky wheel will always choose you.

—Mitchell Hegman