An Intimate Fire

When I was a boy, nothing pleased me more than an opportunity to feed and poke at a campfire. I quickly learned that each and every fire has its own look and—for lack of a better term—personality. The stacks of wood varied in shape, size, and combustibility, and ambient conditions shifted each time. The flames danced across a wide color spectrum, beginning with yellow and edging into powder blue. I learned to appreciate unique aspects of each fire, and since tending my first, I have developed a sort of oneness with each fire I tend.

For the last couple of days, the overnight temperatures have dipped low enough to prompt me to start fires in our new wood stove. The stove features a glass door, allowing me to watch the fire. I can witness the first flames wavering, tentatively exploring the thin-split kindling. To begin, I pull open the door to let a rush of air urge the flames deeper and higher into the cross-stacked logs. Soon, orange flames waver up, scissoring into the wood. Before long, the entire stack is engulfed in flames fringed with crawlers of blue, and the first ghosts of heat issue forth.

This is my fire, and with modulations of the damper and the occasional addition of a split from a round, I train the fire to consume the wood at a rate that pleases me. I watch as the logs gradually crumble and collapse into a deep red bed of pulsating embers. Heat presses against me if I stand nearby, and at some point, both I and the fire become intimate and ageless.

A New Fire

A Mature Fire Tinged with Blue

—Mitchell Hegman

Influencers

I read a story about a pair of “influencers” who drowned not long after refusing to wear lifejackets while taking a small launch boat to shore following a party on a yacht off the Brazilian coast.

First, we need to figure out what an “influencer” is. According to ChatGPT: “A social media influencer is a person who has built a following on social media platforms (like Instagram, YouTube, TikTok, or Twitter) and can influence the opinions, behaviors, and purchasing decisions of their audience. These individuals are typically known for their expertise, personality, or unique content in a specific area, such as fashion, fitness, travel, gaming, or beauty.”

The two influencers in question, Aline Tamara Moreira de Amorim, 37, and Beatriz Tavares da Silva Faria, 27, were found dead after their launch was swamped and sank off a stretch of Brazil's coast known as the Devil's Throat. Both women were health and fitness influencers and had refused to wear life preservers because they were taking selfies and were concerned the safety wear would interfere with their tanning.

“Well, I guess they died with nice tan lines,” Desiree remarked when I related the story to her.

Aline Tamara Moreira de Amorim

—Mitchell Hegman

Spuds

A lot of people in my hometown called potatoes “spuds.” As near as I can tell, potatoes are called "spuds" because of a tool once used in their cultivation. The term "spud" originally referred to a type of small digging tool used to remove weeds or prepare soil for planting, and it eventually became associated with digging up potatoes. In 19th-century English slang, "spud" came to mean the potato itself, likely because of this connection with digging up tubers.

My apologies to all the potatoes out there, but they are not terribly romantic. Potatoes are rather thick and bulky—not sexy like string beans or curvy like peppers. And, remember, they once caused a famine in Ireland. Yet, given the proper treatment, they can carry the weight of a good meal. Yesterday, Desiree and I worked together to produce a brace of perfectly beautiful baked potatoes. This required bacon, of course, and a three-part cooking regimen involving the microwave, oven, and an active finish on the grill outside.

I am sharing a picture of Desiree with our lovely spuds.

Perfection!

—Mitchell Hegman

A Conversation with Desiree

ME: “Why is there an eggshell with seeds in it in our laundry room?”

DESIREE: “I’m going to start some plants.”

ME: “In an eggshell?”

DESIREE: “Yes.”

ME: “But why in an eggshell?”

DESIREE: “They say that’s the best way to germinate seeds.”

ME: “Who are they?”

DESIREE: “Your best friend.”

ME: “Okay, remind me, who is my best friend?”

DESIREE: “Your best friend, Google.”

ME: “Got it. I can run with that.”

Following is a quick explanation my friend Google provided:

“Eggshells are almost entirely calcium carbonate, which is one of the most essential nutrients for thriving plants. As they break down, the eggshells enrich the soil with calcium and nitrogen, which the plant's roots will absorb and put to use as it grows.”

Desiree's Seeds in an Eggshell  

—Mitchell Hegman

A Rock on a Post

Some things make sense on the surface—they are instinctive, and you don’t need to dive deeply to know it’s the right thing to do. A perfect example of this is opening the door for someone who is carrying something. It’s an automatic human response.

Another action that falls into this category is placing a rock on top of a post when you come across one in the middle of nowhere. It just makes sense to find a rock and place it on top of the post—no need for explanation.

Yesterday, I passed by a lone fence post that had been recently pounded into the ground at the edge of what we call Big Tire Gulch. I immediately noticed that someone had placed a smooth, roundish rock on top. This pleased me so much that I stopped and captured a photograph. Had someone else not done so, I would have felt compelled to find a rock for the post myself.

A Rock on a Post

—Mitchell Hegman

All You Need

It seems like it has taken me forever to figure this out, but the Beatles were correct: all you need is love.

—Mitchell Hegman

The Galvanized Problem

If someone wanted to squeeze valuable information out of me (assuming I had any), they wouldn’t need to shove me inside a torture chamber and twiddle with me. All they would need to do is hand me a pipe wrench and force me to either do some plumbing or spill the beans. I would spill everything I knew—and then some—to avoid plumbing. And the only thing I like less than plumbing is plumbing with galvanized steel piping, especially for water.

Here’s the thing: at some point, galvanized pipe will deteriorate (in the form of rust) and then leak.

When I constructed my house thirty-three years ago, I did my best to use copper, brass, and plastic fittings throughout the plumbing system. Unfortunately, I ended up with galvanized fittings in two locations. The first location was the main shutoff valve, where the water emerges in my crawlspace. That section sprung a leak and flooded my crawlspace in November 2020.

Yesterday, when I pulled out my space-age-looking cluster of reverse osmosis water filters to change them, I discovered a leak in the ½-inch galvanized cap used where my filtration system is tied in.

Here’s the thing: it’s plumbing. It’s in a bad spot to reach. And I know a guy—who is not me—who can fix it. Below, I am sharing pictures of my plumbing issues.

Filter System

The Galvanized Mess Under My Sink

Valve Leak from 2020

—Mitchell Hegman