The Brain Trust

Apparently, it is a myth that the average human uses only ten percent of their brain.  Recent studies show that a normal person uses virtually every nook and cranny of their brain.  As Barry Gordon, a neurologist at Johns Hopkins School of Medicine, notes: “the brain represents three percent of the body’s weight and uses twenty percent of the body’s energy.”   

Obviously, there are notable exceptions to using the entire brain.  You’ve heard that story about the would-be robber, mystified that his pistol did not fire when he pulled the trigger to shoot his victim.  In an attempt to understand why the pistol didn’t work, the would-be robber pointed the pistol at himself so he could peer down the barrel.  He pulled the trigger again.

The pistol fired.

Also consider how, in 1975, an entire generation of deep thinkers (include me here) went out and purchased pet rocks and bell-bottom jeans.  Where were our brains that day? 

Closer to home, I am guessing that half of my relatives operate on about a third of their brain.  And that’s after my great-grandmother on my mother’s side gave us a considerable boost in brain power.  Before that, we were out there trying to stop freight trains and mine shaft cave-ins with our bare hands.  We did not have pistols.

I got to thinking.

What if our brains are simply miniature versions of our physical self?  What if what you see on the outside is what exists on the inside?

That doesn’t bode well for me.  Maybe I am using all of my brain, but here is what my brain looks like:

My brain is short in stature and utterly incapable of a decent jump shot.  My brain’s right foot hurts.  Recently, a great deal of hair-thinning has taken place.  My brain squints when it tries to see in the distance.  A fair amount of energy is wasted because my brain is clumsy and drops stuff.  Mine is not a handsome brain.  My brain has a belly.  It has a lot of scars and wrinkles.

Did I mention that my brain’s ears stick out?

--Mitchell Hegman