If I am Not Here to Make Friends

I have heard at many points during my life (usually in a work environment when someone is about to get mowed-down, figuratively speaking) the saying “we are not here to make friends.”

I am not good at mowing people down.  I am generally not very comfortable with conflict.  Most often, I will try diplomacy first, second, and third.  Even in matters of business, I tend to think about friendships before money.

Years ago, when I became involved in a business start-up, my partner once said to me as we exited from an uncommonly pleasant meeting at the home of a potential customer: “Your problem is that you always become friends with our customers.”

Just a few days back, someone asked me what I thought of X, a person we know in common.

After only a little consideration I said: “X can be difficult on occasion, but I like X.”

The person asking my opinion regarded me momentarily and then remarked: “Yeah, but you like everyone, Mitch.”

I suppose my soft approach to business and conflict is sometimes a form of weakness.  Just the same, if I am not here to make friends…I guess I am not really sure why I am here.

--Mitchell Hegman