Twisted Future Prediction #1

At some point near mid-century, a team of researchers will successfully reanimate the head of Ted Williams, the renowned professional baseball player.   Ted Williams died in 2002 and his body is presently cryogenically preserved (frozen) at the Alcor Life Extending Foundation facility in Scottsdale, Arizona.

The revived head of Ted Williams will be placed on a mysterious life sustaining “black box.” Almost immediately following reanimation, the head of Ted Williams will embark on a full schedule of motivational speaking engagements.  Eventually, Ted’s head will decide to run for Congress in Arizona on a third party platform that advocates placing automatic bubblers and dish soap in all publicly held ponds.  The head of Ted Williams will end every stump speech by loudly proclaiming: “I envision a world filled with rainbow bubbles.”

The head of Ted Williams will lead the polls until a televised debate, at which time one of the opposing candidates will suggest that the head of Ted Williams “lacks the balls” to be a proper leader.  His candidacy will ultimately collapse when the camera crew zooms in on the ball-less life support box below Ted’s head.

                   

--Mitchell Hegman