The Tesla Broccoli Cage

If you know much about Nikola Tesla, you know that he gave us the use of electricity as we presently know it.

Tesla was a complex man—a mix of brilliant inventor and sideways nutball.  On one hand, he gave us three-phase power and the induction motor.  On the other hand, he was out wandering with street-side pigeons.  Arguably, the most important relationship in Tesla’s life was that which he had with a pet pigeon.  He was incautious with money.  Some historians assert that Tesla self-castrated so that his mind would not wander off his work in favor of chasing women.

My friend, Kevin, is a lot like Nikola Tesla.  He definitely has the “wandering with pigeons” part.   And he is brilliant.

Earlier this spring, Kevin suggested that we (that girl and I) grow some broccoli up here at our place.   “I will start a plant for you.  You can plant it in a pot by your deck.  I will build you a cage to keep the deer out.”

That girl and I thought that a capital idea.

Last week, Kevin began constructing a cage using materials he had on hand.  I began to worry only when Kevin started calling his work “the Tesla broccoli cage.”

“I am using as much copper wire as I can,” Kevin explained.  “As an electrician, you should appreciate this,” he added.

Yesterday, Kevin and I hauled the Tesla broccoli cage up to my house from Kevin’s place below.

I like the Tesla broccoli cage immensely.

Honestly, the damned thing invokes Nikola Tesla.  As we stood looking at the cage, Kevin remarked: “Maybe you will be able to pick up television from Tokyo now.”

I am posting a photograph of Keven standing beside the Tesla broccoli cage.  We still need to plant the broccoli and Kevin needs a bit more wire around the bottom.  Please note that Kevin (fresh from his work) is wearing both safety glasses and a lab smock.  Finally, the pockets of Kevin’s smock are filled with pretty rocks that he gathered near my house.

Tesla all the way.

--Mitchell Hegman